Maybe my luck is turning.....

That, Dear Readers, is my one and only photo of my grandparents together. Years ago I had many photos of my Grandma, but as many of you know, I had a terrible apartment fire where most of my photos went up in flames. It was years before I tried my hand at photography again. In fact its only been a couple of years now.

This photo means so much to me. I know those of you who have known me for a few years could probably tell stories about my grandparents yourself now. I have quoted them and written parables about the way they lived and loved so much. I've actually saved many of the emails I've received about these stories because your responses touch my heart.

I'm not sure how old they were in this photo. It doesn't matter. Can you see the love in the way they stand so close together. Grandpa is supporting her back with his arm. He always did that. If you look closely you will see that my Grandma is looking upwards at him, usually he was looking downward at her. Usually they were smiling, but they were probably just pausing before leaving when this shot was taken. It looks as if Grandpa had just opened her door for her. Just one of those common ordinary things he always did for ladies that ruined me for all other men I think.

I received this photo in my email yesterday from my cousin Janie (Freckles on Multiply). I cried when I first looked at it and I've been flooded with happy memories ever since. It was the first of many happy lucky events that make me feel as if my run of sadness and frustration may be coming to an end.

Seriously, it wasn't just the deaths of my Aunt Ethel and Grandmother. Those losses couldn't be overcome by a simple photograph but I seemed to have stopped feeling sorry for myself over them. Self pity is such an ugly thing.

 Work has been frustrating and busy. My GM has been out ill and the Front Desk Manager and I have been trying to cover all the little things she needs to manage from her sick-bed so she only needs to come out for major things. I've been doing my job ok but computers keep breaking down (we really need to replace some important ones) and to be honest, its getting harder and harder to bring them back to life. I've been getting frustrated with my coworkers because I keep having to show and tell them the same things over and over and over. I've been repairing things left and right at home too. I forgot to renew my license plate and insurance on time. Now I have to find new insurance before March 3 (I don't actually have to...but they ticked me off by trying to raise my rates!). I did actually renew my plates on time but I live in fear of getting stopped because I haven't received my sticker yet so all I have is a printed out receipt until it arrives, probably tomorrow. Then I blew out a tire yesterday on the way to work and it took all day to find someone who would put my doughnut on for me. My brother came through for me though. (My second bit of luck....He always does. Bless his widdle black heart. I'm a lucky sister.) Then the tire shops tried to rip me off wanting over $120 to put on 2 USED tires. I told them No and decided to give it a day so I didn't shoot anyone.

Today I replaced those tires for get this $35! It was supposed to be $40 when I called and I was pretty happy with that...but since I smiled so pretty he called it ladies day and knocked $5.00 off the price. Yes that included putting the dern things on too. The tires are nice too. I probably can get a year and a half off of them.

Then I went to the Supermarket and no joke, virtually everything I bought was on sale and I got a couple of free hoosier fries because I made the girl at the counter laugh. Seriously. I spent $88 but I saved over $40.

I stopped off to buy gas and the guy at the gas station gave me an extra 2 bucks free. Seriously. I asked for $10 but he set it for $12 and when I went back to pay for it, he said No no no....free to me.

Then I came home and took a nap.

As Princess of the Universe, my daughter, Cecelia used to say: "Tomorrow is gonna be a great day!"

Native American wedding photos

August 30th was a beautiful Summer Day. Much too hot for an outdoor wedding....but like the ancestors that I am sure witnessed us from Heaven....we endured.

All the costumes are authentic hand made costumes made mostly by my Mother, but my nephew Adam made his own costume as did the Chief and his wife. Cherokee women don't get to wear the sexy outfits that Apaches wore. Nope we are required to be FULLY covered and modest. Sucks big time.

We entered the blessed circle in the traditional clockwise manner were handed a small packet and took our seats. Families sit together. Singles sit separately. The smells of sage and tobacco permeated our senses but it was a lovely smell, not at all like cigarrettes because this was utreated tobacco. The tobacco was not for smoking at this point. It was for an offering. Sage is burned to bless the circle, much the same way that catholic priests and wiccans use it. The Cherokee way of faith seems very Catholic at times...with a touch of witchcraft. I realize that statement may offend some, I mean no disrespect, I am just trying to describe what I've lived with most of my life.

The wedding ceremony

Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.

Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.

Now there is no more loneliness, for each of you will be companion to the other.

Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before you.

Go now to your dwelling to enter into the days of your life together.

And may your days be good and long upon the earth.

My mother is in the red-print dress, Dave's (the groom) mother is in the solid pinkish dress. My sister Rhonda is wearing a traditional floral headpiece made by her neighbor. The blue blankets are full of symbolism, mostly about solitude, reflection and loyalty. They each have thier own native woven blanket to symbolise their separate beginnings. Behind the chief you will notice the basket with white gifts in it. These were packets of real tobacco in order for us to thank the Great Spirit by enriching the Earth. A wonderful event occurred during this ceremony. 2 hawks (our family's totem consists of hawks and wolves. I've always considered myself a wolf, which is the minority, but Rhonda considers herself a hawk) began circling the wedding site (consecrated ground which was roped off). This is considered a wonderful omen, a blessing from our ancestors and Heaven itself. I believe in omens like this. The circle became steadily smaller until the hawks were almost hovering around and around Rhonda and Dave. I silently said *Hi* to my Grandpa and cousin Sue for attending. I'm sure they also wanted Rhonda to finally feel the joy she has always deserved.

The Blessing

Above you are the stars, below you are the stones.

As time does pass, remember, like a star should your love be constant.

Like a stone should your love be firm.

Have patience with each other, for storms will come, but they will go quickly.

Be free in giving of affection and warmth and be sensuous to one another.

Have no fear, and let not the words of the unenlightened give you unease.

For the Great Spirit is with you, now and forever.

A May Naa (amen)

Now they are given their own single white blanket to symbolise, of course, that the two are now one. The white color is to symbolise the purity of thier love, white was not always available, and not required so much as the best fabric or hide available. It is more about placing the highest value on the partnership rather than the parts of the marriage. Truly, if all marriages had this basis, I think that divorce could almost be ended.

A Ceremonial Dance

This is Adam, my nephew, my brother's son. He is a well known Native American artist as well as competitive in both drums and dance in our area. The last couple of years, he's even ventured outside the area. He has won many many events. Pay close attention to his costume. He made everything. Even the thread. He hunted the deer that hide came from with a bow and arrow. He didn't waste any of it. What wasn't eaten was used for clothing or art. Native Americans never kill animals indiscriminately. It is against our faith to waste the Earth or its creatures. Every one of those feathers he gathered and cleaned. He made the beads from twigs and stones and various other *found* objects. Native Americans recycle everything as a way of life and out of respect to the Earth that the Great Spirit provided us.

After the ceremony we blessed the ground with our tobacco and went to the gift blanket to pick out our tokens from the happy couple. Cherokee people measure wealth, not by how much you retain, but by how much you give away. Weddings are a big event and require many gifts. I think it is a wonderful way of life even if I can't practice it fully. I do live in a white world.

We left by rejoining and completing the circle.


Rhonda, Adam, Dave

Of course the folks had to have this shot. The happy couple and their gorgeous grandson.

I wish y'all could have enjoyed it with me. I will post more pictures of the absurdity of the guests in the near future. I wore shorts. They were nice ones and it was over 95 degrees in the shade. Some bikers wore some crazy shit! Gotta love thier attitude though. Love me or not...here I am. Salt of the Earth types. Several people were dressed more traditionally formal as well. The hog (hawg) was roasted to perfection and we had 2 tables of additional food and yet another table for deserts. If anyone left hungry it was their own fault.

I will never marry again.... but if I did this would be the way to go. Its technically not legal (no divorce needed though Rhonda and Dave had a legal marriage and a regular nondemonitional religious ceremony first) yet it still invokes real commitment. Not to mention its cool to be casual.

Where oh where is my little boy?

I have a sleep headache. Its that kind you get when you haven't been sleeping and catch up all at once. Other than that I'm feeling pretty good.

I took Walter skating yesterday...I wish I would have remembered the camera! I didn't watch all of it (y'all know it scares me to watch), but he is getting very impressive these days. Talk abounds about him getting sponsored soon.

He's already begun losing his Winter-weight. As you know he is also attracting a lot of female attention.

The PYT's don't bother me so much....its the older girls I want to slap! Some of these women are in thier 20's and 30's that have begun oggling my baby! I'm thinking *Over YOUR dead body Bitch!*.

After what I seen yesterday, I'm glad he's got himself a girlfriend. That puts him off limits and he is much too old fashioned and too much of a gentleman to cheat on his girlfriend. Since she is as innocent and sweet as he is, it is much better this way. I saw the light of corruption in the eyes of a couple of those bimbettes. I am going to bake Danielle some cookies. Maybe I will take her and Walter to the library or to go swimming at the hotel.

I know he looks older, he's kind of tall, naturally muscular and with that mustache and the beginnings of a beard, but sheesh! I have to get my brother over here to teach this kid how to shave.

I wonder if he would wear a shirt that said *Hey I'm still a kid!*

I'll get a recent picture of him up here soon and y'all can tell me how to make this kid look younger.

Here's one from a year ago:

It's the jaw line isn't it?

Where is that little boy I keep looking for?

He looks like this:



If you see him, Tell him his mama is looking for him!

Goin fer a walk....

"Today is your day. You're off to Great
Places! You're off and away!"~~Dr. Seuss

I refused all offers today and walked home. It was a beautiful day. I don't know if many of you realize this, but until the Great Depression hit, South Bend was a happening kind of town.

Seriously we were!!!

Some of the most well known politicians and socialites kept homes here. Our streets are named for them! We were pretty affluent back then and it shows in some of the architecture that still stands tightly squeezed between the more modern atrocities (I'm not much for steel and glass buildings...I like brick and wood)here.

If you'd like to join me in my walk home just follow the pictures, I'm not sure I have them in the right order (renamed them all) but close enough.



Leaving work.....I'm so glad I get to work on the main floor of this building...I get dizzy just looking up!



The Court House (I believe this is the second Court House, we have several).



Our own little Lady Liberty.... I know it isn't much, but size isn't supposed to matter.

I just love this copper light. One of these days I expect some derelict to rip it off though....There's been a lot of metal looting from our buildings recently.

I love this doorway, but it looks too forbidding to be on a church! I'm not ready for Judgment yet!

This is the reddest church I've ever seen. Love the round window though.

This is the church in its entirety, I love all the brick and stone work on it.

The steeple on this more modern church looks like its actually trying to reach Heaven.

Now we just begin looking at some of the incredible houses on my way home. Amazingly enough these houses used to be single family homes (no doubt those families had 10 or 15 kids but still!) Now most of them are either apartments or office complexes....

Seriously, what a shame.....

The two pictures below are of my dream house....I've been gazing at this house since I was a little girl.... I have dreams where I actually live in it... It represents so much to me, I don't know why I am so drawn to it, but I have been longer than I can actually remember.... If I ever win the lottery....That baby is MINE!

It was so sunny out that my glasses went almost black and so windy that my face is all red...but I still feel invigorated!

It was a lovely walk and for the first time in month, I feel pretty good about the world!

I do believe it is FINALLY Spring!

So be sure when you step.Step with care and great tact and remember that "Life's a Great Balancing Act." Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left~~~Dr. Seuss

Just being

Its a beautiful day in the 'hood. Only heard two shots last night! ROFLMAO I should be more concerned but truth be told they are just shooting at each other.

I slept easy anyway.

It's like that old series Highlander....in the end there can be only one. Then hopefully the local police force will be able to stop that one.

I was playing a bit in one of my photo programs and found a cute picture of Walter when he was about 6 and manipulated it into something more indicative of what was to come...




By that angelic face you can see why I didn't see this whole adolescent thing coming..... I shouldn't have let him eat his sister's cookies.... What the Hell does she put in those?

At any rate its a sunnier day and I think I've solved my hives problem...it looks as if I've been spider bitten in a few places. At any rate the hives are clearing up...hopefully it won't take as long as the scratch on my nose (still visible after a month) that the cats gave me.

Have a wonderful day everyone. I will be by tonight after work.

The Beast and me....

This is Walter....he's just a tiny bit rowdy. He keeps me on my toes when he's not knocking me off my feet. 14 years old and pure energy! People have commented on how almost all my photos I'm laughing out loud.... He's most of the reason!

My baby girl and me...

This is Celia, she's 23 and still a newly wed. ....she really likes me she just wouldn't smile for this shot... She's ornery like that....grinning pictures of her later.... Isn't she a beauty? She doesn't believe me. Not one bit of makeup on this perfect face of hers....she wakes up like this. Her hair is as silky as it looks.... Her real beauty though is all inside.....Best daughter ever!

My eldest & me

This is Richard. He's mine. Guess there's no denying it huh? 26 year old single male to all the young ladies out there. As you can see, he's handsome and built with bricks! How did he grow up so fast? Where is my baby?