Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Amor animi arbitrio sumitur, non ponitur

We choose to love, we do not choose to stop loving.--latin proverb

I stole that quote from a friend of mine (and right now I only have just friends) on the dating site Plenty of Fish (which despite my poor judgment is still a great free dating site).

It really is the perfect quote for him, he is a tough on the outside and soft in the middle type of guy. A perfect quote for that type of site.

I was played. I know this now.

I don't know why he emailed me letters telling me how much he loved me after I called it quits. (that is why I gave him the 2 week window to come to his senses) Some pathetic need to hang onto all the hearts he takes a grab at I guess. I felt so guilty about breaking his poor little heart. I felt bad about giving up so soon and the tough choices I had to make.

I felt like a failure because I couldn't break through his *wall of fear*. That wall is nothing but a prop. That way he can get a woman's full attention without ever having to commit to her or give up any real thing from himself.

He's going to be lonely here in a few years when his children finally grow up.

I felt sorry about that too.

Now I just feel kind of stupid.

I'm going to get over this.....My heart might be made of glass, but my spine is made of steel.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know all I knew about him was through you, but he didn't seem like "That kind" of guy. I'm surprised! ~~Kath~~

Lisa :-] said...

I haven't been doing any e-dating, and yet, I have learned to be very wary of relationships formed on the internet. It is WAAAAYYYY too easy to misrepresent ones self here in the ether. I know you have a lot more experience with the whole online dating thing than I do, but I don't think it's a very good place to go looking for a relationship. People who can't start relationships with the real people in their lives usually have something to hide, or have huge commitment issues. I would love for you to find the perfect mate...I just don't think that online is the place to find that person. Just my opinion...

Tracy~ said...

well, hell. I'm so sorry to hear this. I hate he did this to you. I can't stand men like that. My philosophy is to dat and if you're not interested, let me know. Don't waste my time, energy or play with my heart.

I wish I could give you a hug. I'm so sorry Tressa.

I think that finding someone online can work. It's just like anywhere else.... you gotta weed through what is real and what isn't.